The Message Is In The Receiver.....

  Several of us in the office have children on the spectrum, and we all track our progress together, sharing triumphs and disappointments. We were talking about what it would be like for just one day to be able to view the world through our children's senses.
  My dear friend and associate looked at me with her Shaman like gaze ( she is a very old soul ) and said very cheerfully,
 " You know, really, the message is in the receiver. If you are standing on one mountain and you are sending the smoke signals for D, O, G, and the guy on the next mountain reads that as C, A, T,
then the message was CAT!"

  I have let that sink in for a few weeks and you know I can't get it out of my mind! It goes back to what I spoke about in the first few blogs about perspective. That filter that we all carry around with us that determines the meaning of what we HEAR regardless of what has been actually SAID to us. Our crab shell. 
 
Our kids can't change their filters that easily. The inflexibility that characterizes Autism, Aspergers and ADD make it difficult for them to interpret the subtlies of communication and meaning.  But it really is food for thought for the rest of us, don't you agree?
 
Clean communication in our lives requires being very concious of what we are saying without saying anything. The statistic is that 70% of communication is non verbal. Wow. How's that for a mind blower!
How often do you pay attention to your body language? How good a listener are you? Do you often hear CAT when someone is trying to say DOG?

  Truth is a concept framed by perspective. My reality is my reality. No one can change that, but me. My truth is different than your truth is different than that of the guy next door. But within my own framework or map of the world, I can change how I interpret the information that comes in through my filter. Especially if how I am currently interpretting is not serving my highest good.

 ( I am often struck by how much self talk goes on for me while someone else is talking. A Personal Best lesson that has really stuck with me is trying to remember to put aside my stuff for a moment and be present for the person that is trying to communicate with me. To honour that person and their message. But boy it is a lot like paying attention to the breath hitting the triangle under my nose when I am meditating. It takes a lot of continual refocusing! The mind is an undisciplined child. I am truly working on mine!)
 
  What about your filter? Is is clogged up with self doubt, or negative self talk? Are you really hearing what is being said? We have the ability to change our filters, eliminate that self doubt and negative chatter that we all hear, and be more present in our lives. Maybe it's time for a little spring cleaning, shake out the beliefs that limit us in our lives. Clear up our visions of what is truly important to us.

  I challenge you to think about that over the weekend and the next conversation you have, pay attention to what is happening for you. Are you really hearing what is being said?
  In love and light,
Kathryn